Nicolas Steno's 374th Birthday

Nicolas Steno was a Danish pioneer in both anatomy and geology. He is considered to be the father of geology and stratigraphy.

And today being his birthday, Google has made this nice geological picture to mark it.

Falling back into a slump.

Its been at least six months since I've started working on my blog again and two months since I've gotten my Adsense account approved. However, progress have been sluggish and sometimes I can't help but wonder whether what I'm doing is fruitful or not.

I do know that its too early to give up, but with adsense's report telling me that I've "earned" like one cent a month, its frankly speaking demoralizing me.

So much for all those internet websites stating that it is "soooooooooooooooooo" easy to earn a living on the internet. I've tried tons of things from pay per download schemes, to freelancing on the internet (Elance, etc) and now adsense + amazon associates. So far, none has shown the ability to "sustain" the basic needs of food, lodging and bills.

Maybe I gave up too easily, maybe I just don't have enough of a choice to push on further. All I'm asking for is a way to earn a living so that I can find my way in life, but even that seems like an impossible dream...

Without knowing what's ahead, people start to fear. They pause and wondered if they're doing the right thing or whether they're trying hard enough. I am one of them...I'm sure there are plenty like me. Whatever I tried to do, there always seems to be an invisible door that prevents me from moving onto that path. Its like I'm "lacking" some sort of "key" to open the doors.

Having a degree doesn't seem to help in landing me a job and it feels like education has "deceived" me. It took me a year or so to finally find my first job which I did for about four years before some changes caused me to lose that job.

Before I had my first job, during the year or so, I was in a slump quite similar to what I'm having now. After I got a job and worked, I soon forgotten about this and now, its back again. Its like I haven't changed at all huh? Or maybe its just another cycle.

For now, its been another year of being a Neet for me. Its not that I haven't tried looking for a job, but it seems that the job always eludes me. I did get an interview a couple of times, but being "too" honest always "kills" me in the end.

So I've thought about the things I like and could do and will not have any "entry requirements". Thus, this idea of doing the blog, but even then it seems like it won't be an easy task either.

I don't think I will give up on doing this blog though, because I kind of like what I am doing, though I don't know how much of this stuff is actually "wanted" on the internet or is it just plain "garbage" to others.

And its been a pretty good "experience" for me too, after looking at my blog now, it seems that I've come a pretty decent way. Its like my "achievement". From originally a single blog, I've now split my ramblings and game blog into two, added a facebook corner, a twitter and even a youtube channel.

I'm just putting this up as ramblings so that if anyone stumbles upon this and feels the same way as I do, the thing is that they shouldn't give up searching for their way in life. Keep trying, keep stumbling, keep on crawling and moving onward. Press on. Hopefully I won't give up too.

Life doesn't have a meaning. You have to give it your own meaning.

- BuLaDiFu -

PS: Apparently, there are quite a few instances where people actually googled "Lost in Life". I did too and found myself into some forum and then went on to some interesting articles.

Here's the link to the site:
The Courage to Live Consciously
The Meaning of Life: Intro